Topic: my life unscripted
february 16 06' the fact that i continue to write from st louis means that i have not yet quit. i usually dig my own graves as is the case out here. when i engineered this year on the survice i was honestly stoked i thought it was goign to be a great year. i was coming back from africa, so glad to be back in the US i was going to be earning a year of college credit for a very cheap price. i was set up witha job that paid $11 dollars an hour, i was goign to get to spend a year around my brotha who i had not been around in 3 years, and on top of that i was going to get to really partisipate in youth ministry as an intern, somethingi thought i would love and be good at , and that was ultimently was the conerstone to what brought me out here. i write having lived out here for almost 6 months and heres what i have concluded to this point. college has now become the cornerstone of what im doing. somehow i got a 4.0 and acidemics and scholerships are now very important. considering that college is now most important doesent make sense... why would u come all the way to stl to go to community college? as of today i barely partisipate in youth ministry and at this point it would be best to drop it all together considering nothing productive will come out of the next 2 months. im still being paid 11 dollars an hour however not really seeing brain has really negated siting him as a reason to come out here. so basically i conclude that the main funct of me being out here is to work a job that pays $11 dolalrs an hour. considering i may only be out here for 2 more months i just dont seek to build community. welp im realizing this blog has no real point...

"better safe than sorry"?
Now Playing: jackie j babie
Topic: my life unscripted
i believe the greatest threat to the health of my life is an unscene foe. im never critisized, critiqued, nor give i anger anyone. im stunned by the influence of balanced conservitiism on the class and ethnictihy of the people i come from. wede rather protect than gain. we rather be gareented a draw than to risk losing. were taught to take turns. were given limits and scolded when we cross those.

although its not explicitly stated i think the strongest message in my life is to never cross boundries that could hurt me. we choose voluntarely to shelter ourself. im just not sure at this juncture if being right includes everything within a certain speare. maybe right is a distinct and specific spot. and falling short or laying up well short of the dot doesent nessicary mean that ur still right. maybe not pushing your boundries to the fullest is JUST as DANGEROUS and UNHEALTHY as crossing those boundries?
wisdom as you contemplate...
mDb

Mood:  blue
Topic: my life unscripted
sitting here sunday morning i feel like quitting on my future. up to this point i have worked so hard to do the nessicary things to put myself in a position to be in control of my own destiny. 2 weeks into the 2nd semester im tired of work, im tired of school, and really im just tired of always swimming upstream. with my eyes potentially set on law school in 5 years i feel like each class is important. but with week 21 approaching since i moved to st louis i am finding it very difficult to stay focused in school when i am currently attending st charles community college. school here is like being in grade 13. comming off last semester where i finsihed witha perfect 4.0 over 13 credit hours now as week 3 begins i havent even opened a book. the monotony of being a janator is starting to wear. not so much the difficulty of the job but rather the envirorment of which i am always surrounded in. how do u stay focused on being exceptional when in school or work you are constantly surrounded by people who have no real desire to improve their quality of life, people who put in their 8 hours per day go home and just try and make it to the next month?

tired from stl,
matt

Topic: FAITH / CULTURE
In western civilation history class we often use the bible as well as the koran and evaluate them based on their historical value and what we can learn about past civilations through the historical accounts of both of these books. although these books are distinctly different some stories, if u some homework on these books you MIGHT find the same story told from different accounts as well as similar characters that are referanced in both books. or u may say no...no thats just too different. assume similarites exist which many would say they do. do we give equal footing to both these accounts in the koran as we give to the bible? one side might argue no...no the bible is inspired and thus has a special notch on all other historical books. still their are others who would say "sure, why cant u teach from that part of the koran if the story, characters and morals are the same. what do u think?

without commenting directly on what i think about this specific question i want to prematurity add my own seperate thoughts to widen the question...
i think the bible is incredably valuable. i think it gives us a direction to head in, similar to a lighthouse safetly guiding a boat in a story. and while i think the bible is 100% truth, i think its only an expression of truth-not allincompasing truth. i think the basis of truth may not be the bible but rather jesus himself and his character and nature. the implications are this... is the bible complete? i would say how can we know? maybe their shold be more added or some taken away. but really it does not matter. my point is we shift away from betting the farm on a text and move more towards basing our faith on a broader expression of truth.
but we must search truth with these motives
Pauls words to timothy
"sincere faith...pure heart"

A STARTING POINT
Mood:  chillin'
I put off starting one of these for so long becuase of the enormous amount of catchup i feel i have to do. esentially everyone i know has a running blogg and i always felt my blog will never amount to anything.

so starting points is what ive entitled this and i think somewhere, u need to start with baby steps. baby steps turn into steps and steps into strides.

as i step out into life away from home and comfort this is my thoughts, events of my life, and my response to them. i dont claim to have a monopoly on all the right answers but rather to be contribuating to an ongoing conversation?

your author matthew david
[SMALL STEPS JANUARY 8TH 2006]